As a pony mad child I looked up to the equestrian stars and dreamed of being just like them…
But I ‘knew’ this couldn’t be my reality due to my physical disability.
Years later my dream came true as I was introduced to the sport of Para Dressage and suddenly I was able to embark on a career with the horses that I loved!
My career as a Great Britain Para Dressage rider began in 2004 when I was selected onto the world class development program for the Paralympic sport of dressage.
I couldn’t believe that I was in this position — taking part in an equestrian sport and aiming for gold at european championships, world championships and Paralympic Games!!
“To be in this position was beyond my wildest dreams and I embraced every second!”
To be in this position was beyond my wildest dreams and I embraced every single second!
I spent five years on the development squad doing exactly that… developing! During this time I had various horses to ride and was lucky to be supported by world class coaches and sports science staff who helped my horses and I to develop along this amazing journey.
By 2008 I had found a horse who, I didn’t know at the time but would take me onto the next level of my journey.
Purdy’s Dream or ‘Eddie’ to his friends was advertised on the notice board at my local tack shop and was only a few miles away.
On going to see ‘Eddie’ despite him looking a bit like a cow due to his underdeveloped muscle he had all of the other qualities I was looking for in my next equine partner — so I decided to give him ago.
During our first year competing together Eddie and I were quick to form and develop a solid partnership as we started posting mid-70% scores in our dressage tests.
By the summer of 2009 we had made it to the final selection competition where the Great Britain Para Dressage team were to be selected for the European Championships to be held in Norway.
To my absolute delight, Eddie and I were selected for our first ever championship team… we were heading to Norway to represent Equestrian Team GBR — WOW!
Eddie and I were selected as part of team of seven — we were the ‘new kids on the block’ at this level. We exceeded everybody’s expectations by winning a silver medal and then exceeded them even more by pipping my experienced teammate to the post to take the gold medal in the freestyle to music class.
Not bad, coming home from my first major championship as european champion!
My winning streak continued as I headed into 2010 and onto Kentucky for the World Equestrian Games.
Despite breaking my teeth on the bronze medal that I had won in the individual test, I went on to take the gold again in the freestyle to music class…
At this point I was both World and European Champion!!
By the end of 2011 I had added another two individual silver medals and a team gold medal to my my name taking my total medals won to three golds, three silvers and a bronze medal and as a result I was awarded with the British Equestrian Federation’s Medal of Honour.
I went into the selection process for the London 2012 Paralympic Games with high hopes… well, I had as good a chance as anyone of being selected for the games.
Representing my country in a Paralympic Games on home soil was a once in a lifetime opportunity and it would have been the icing on the cake.
But it wasn’t to be…
March 2012, my dad sadly passed away after a long illness. Despite my grief I was determined to continue training for my ‘Paralympic dream’, I really wanted to make dad proud once more.
However, the selectors had other ideas and believed that I wasn’t in the right frame of mind to take on the big challenge of London — I was heartbroken… my London 2012 dream was over!
From that point my career took a turn and I seemed to fall from the top of my game to the bottom very quickly, believe me it’s not nice decent!
As my gold medal winning horse retired things started to fall apart as a lost my new, young horse in tragic circumstances — circumstances which I don’t think I will ever get over.
I eventually got a horse on loan with the aim of continuing my career and being selected onto another championship team but by this time I felt that I had lost support of the squad, both the coach and the management.
I have always struggled to come to terms with why I never got the support that I needed during this time. I had more than earned my place on the squad, I had bought home medals for my country, including gold and I had shown that I could deliver both under pressure and through challenging circumstances.
“Thing is, my face didn’t fit”
Thing is, my face didn’t fit. There were a group of riders who the management and coaching staff were invested in… and that group didn’t include me!
Despite there being a trust set up to buy horses for performance squad members, I was refused!
I worked hard along with my personal trainer to develop a partnership with the horse that I got on loan but even when I asked for feedback, nothing was forthcoming.
Eventually at the end of 2016, I was told that I was being taken off the squad.
I was heartbroken — heartbroken that I had been treated in this way and heartbroken that my career was over!
I don’t think people understand what being involved in sport means — it’s a whole way of life and being involved in equestrian sport takes it to a new level. It’s day-in, day-out, training, looking after the horses… it’s well, life!!
In the aftermath of me coming off the squad life was tough. I was left with no career, no horses and no support- everything was gone, life was empty and somedays it felt like life wasn’t worth living.
Emma Sheardown, TEDx/Motivational Speaker, Disability Confidence Speaker and Author is available for keynote presentations for business gatherings, corporate conferences and groups of all sizes. Topics include confidence to achieve, breaking through barriers, positive thinking and disability awareness.
Connect with Emma on: facebook.com/ESheardownMotivationalSpeaker | linkedin.com/in/esheardown-motivationalspeaker | twitter.com/sheardown_emma | Instagram.com/emma_sheardown
